Test Questions

Last weekend our church sponsored a women's event for the entire Kenai Peninsula.  It was great.  There were at least 250 women there, which is amazing considering the small population around these parts.  To warm up the crowd, the mistress of ceremonies asked some questions.  If your answer was yes, you stood up and then sat down again.  The questions were very interesting, like a test toward the goal of becoming a sourdough.   Keep in mind that someone stood for every question and the audience was women only.

1.  Who traveled 100 miles or more to get here?
2.  Who has traveled from the other side of the Bay to get here?  (that would be by boat in sub-zero weather)
3.  Who went mountain climbing on their honey moon?
4.  Who wears X-tra Tuffs at least 50% of the time?  (remember the boots I told you about a couple months ago?)
5.  Who has shot a bear?
6.  Who has driven more than 50 miles on a snow machine?
7.  Who has eaten seal; who has eaten whale?
8.  Who has field-dressed a moose?
9.  Who is a musher? (dog sled driver)
10. Who has road kill in their freezer?  (In AK when a moose is killed by a vehicle the vehicle is far more damaged than the moose but the moose is put down and then given to a citizen whose name is on a registration list.  That person has to get the carcass immediately, no matter what time day or night, and take care of dressing, carving, freezing.
11. Who has a car with no rust?  (There is no inspection of cars or required auto insurance in  AK.)
12. Who has cut your own hole for ice fishing?
13. Who has used an Uzi? (Say, what??)
14. Who has lived in a house with no water?  (This is VERY common here!)
15. Who is packing heat?  (Really?)

After listening to these questions and observing the responses, I realized I'm still a cheechako, not even waving at sourdough yet.  I stayed seated for all but one question.  I'll let you guess which one prompted me to stand.  Here's a hint-----thank you, Toyota.



 


          

Winter Solstice

Today's high temperature in Fairbanks is predicted to be minus 35!  That's right, folks, 35 degrees below zero.  And that's not the lowest "high" today in Alaska.  Thankfully, it's a balmy 3 degrees in Homer right now at 9:45AM.  It's about 1/2 hour before sunrise.  We are about two weeks on the positive side of the solstice, gaining light---more than two minutes a day.  The changes here are rapid.  By March the amount of light will increase to 6-7 minutes a day.

We visited Fairbanks two weeks ago for the solstice.  The good news is that while we were there the temperatures soared to between five and ten degrees above zero---a winter heat wave for that town.  The bad news is that the temperatures were relatively warm which meant it snowed a lot, which meant it was cloudy, which meant we did not get to see an aurora. 

So how do people cope with temperatures that defy the reason and imagination of most of the rest of the world?  Well, there is school-----no matter what.  Now think about this.  When those kids are waiting for the bus or walking, it is pitch black outside and far, far below a comfortable temperature for humans.  Usually it is not windy or snowing, but there would most likely be snow on the ground. The air is very dry and the snow flakes are tiny crystals---noticeably different from the quality of snow farther south.  As the traffic goes by, snow clouds waft up all around so that visibility is poor.  Every inch of skin needs to be covered.  The kids walking to school look like well-padded zombies with only their eyes showing.  If they fell down, one has to wonder if they would be able to get back up.  They go to school in the dark and get home in the dark.

A unique feature of all motels and many stores and homes is a port stationed outside to plug in your car.  This is to prevent your battery from dying because of the cold.  It's just standard operating procedure to plug in your car like may happen if electric cars become the norm in the future. The people in central Alaska are already well trained in this concept.

At noon the sun is only about one degree above the horizon.  It rises about 11AM and sets about 2:30PM. This messes with the mind of a visitor.  It's impossible to estimate the time.  It's forever sunrise or sunset in your mind.  It feels like you should be eating breakfast at every meal.  If you want to see anything outside, there's a very short window to do so.  Sleeping longer is easy.

Yet the people of Fairbanks and other interior villages in Alaska don't just survive. They thrive.  Every little village has a museum.  We went to two that were excellent.  The University of Alaska has a particularly interesting one where you can see everything from mummified mammoths to gold nuggets.  Alaskans love art, coffee and believe it or not, ice cream.  There are opportunities for all of these on every block.  In the winter the art includes amazing ice sculptures in front of many public buildings.  There's even an "Ice Museum" in Fairbanks.  But it's only open in the summer.  Of course!

1.  Getting to Anchorage so we could fly to Fairbanks.

2.  Noon in Fairbanks

3.  4:00PM, Fairbanks

4.  University of Alaska, Fairbanks museum

5.  Ice museum

Fun Is Fun

If you are over 50 you probably remember the Flexible Flyer sled.  It was awesome.  It was shaped almost like a rocket with a wooden platform on top of two long blades.  It had a wooden bar in the front that could be moved from side to side for steering.  You could sit on it and steer with your feet or my favorite, lay down and steer with your hands.  Of course doing it laying down meant you were careening face first down the hill.  There were no brakes.  It was thrilling, fun, sometimes dangerous.  My childhood friends and I went sledding every chance we got.  It was particularly fun at night.  The town where I grew up had loads of hills to choose from.

About a month ago as my friend and I were driving around Homer taking care of endless errands, I suddenly had a wild idea---------we needed to go sled riding.  We had the snow.  We had the hills.  All we needed was a sled.

Let me digress here.  Downtown Homer  has the usual things you'll find everywhere like a post office and numerous banks.  There is one main grocery store, two discount/seconds type grocery stores,  a few boutiques and hair salons, and a building supply store.  Also there is an abundance of art/gift shops and restaurants, most of which are closed in the winter. 

Then there is Ulmers.  When you drive into the parking lot of Ulmers you see an "L" shaped building like a strip mall.  There are labels all the way across it  announcing Hallmark Cards,  Rental Center, Pharmacy, True Value Hardware, Sewing Center.   The first time we stopped there we thought, "Oh, here are half a dozen more stores".   Wrong!  Like an old fashioned general store, all that's advertised outside is in one space inside.  They sell everything but food in there.  You go to Ulmers for everything from snow shoes to greeting cards to baking dishes and oh, so much more-----like, say, sleds.

So we wheeled into Ulmers and each bought a sled.  Of course they didn't have any Flexible Flyers.  Now days all you can find is over-priced plastic slabs, saucers or boats.  We each bought a "boat".  A week or so later we organized a sledding day at my cabin.  We live on a hill and the driveway looked to be just right for sledding---gently sloping and just long enough for geriatric fun!

And fun we had!  There were six of us, all over 50, some well over!  We laughed, screamed,  raced, crashed, spun, and just plumb wore ourselves out.  It was great.  For one person in our group, this was the first time she had ever in her life been sledding.  As you might imagine,  the hardest thing about this activity for us of advanced age was getting in and out of the sled!  Naturally the hill became very fast as we went up and down, and steering was an issue in our "boats".  One man went off the end of the driveway, down an embankment, and into the weeds before stopping.  It seemed quite a long time before we saw his head pop up far past the supposed stopping point.  He was fine, thankfully.  We all were.  In fact we were very fine, thank you.

A week or two later, we did it again.  This time another over 50 friend joined us.  It wasn't until we were sipping cocoa in the cabin afterwards that we learned this had been her first time sledding as well!  She loved it.  See, you can teach an old dog new tricks.  Fun is fun, no matter the age!

The Locals Know

It's 6:00 PM Nov. 1.  The temperature is 28 degrees, and the ground is coated with fresh snow.  Winter has arrived!  Our local friends told us that we would get snow by Halloween.  Sure enough, it snowed the day before, the day of, and the day after.   We're not exactly snowed-in yet.  There's only an inch or two out there.  But it's definitely not melting.  I have broken out the long johns, sweatshirts, and sweaters.  And that's just to stay warm inside our cabin!

We happen to live on a rather steep hill.  Funny thing, it seemed somehow steeper today with snow on it.  It's a very disconcerting feeling to keep pressing the brakes on a car and nothing happens!  Thank heaven for four-wheel drive.  Our turn off is half way down the hill, and I had no idea whether or not I would be able to make the turn.  To complicate matters, our neighbor was turning out of the lane I needed to turn into.  Well, I made it but also learned a lesson.  Local people here know what they're talking about!  We had been repeatedly warned about this hill and how we would need studded tires.  I kept thinking well, we'll see.  We're used to driving in snow.  Our car now has studded tires on it!

Right now, just a few days before daylight savings time ends, the sun rises here about 9:20.  The thing is, the dawn is very short.  It's pitch black until 8:30.  One has no idea of the time when waking up.  The sun sets about 6:10 and goes out with amazing but quick glory.  This evening was no exception.  I kept running in and out the door to take pictures of the various stages of  gorgeousness.  See below and multiply by ten because cameras can't begin to capture the colors or sense of magnificence.

It feels like winter set in very quickly.  Another story locals told us was that when we look at a certain mountain peak across the bay and see an outline of a panda bear, snow would fall on this side of the bay quickly thereafter.  We watched and watched and saw nothing looking like a panda.  It kept snowing on that side of the bay, not ours.  Well, guess what?  Today we saw the panda.  It snowed here most of the day!  Don't know if the panda was there yesterday because the bay and mountains on the other side were shrouded in cloud most of the day. 

But my guess is that we would have seen it if the clouds had lifted.  The locals know!

Cheechako or Sourdough

Recently while traveling to Anchorage and back on an absolutely idyllic weekend, Nelson and I were comparing cheechakos with sourdoughs.  These terms are somewhat unique to Alaska.  A cheechako is someone new to Alaska, a greenhorn, a tenderfoot.  A sourdough is someone who's been here for a long time.  We have friends in both categories, but we, of course, are cheechakos.  It's usually easy to tell the difference.  Following is a list of tell-tale signs that someone is a true Alaskan, a sourdough.

True Alaskans--Sourdoughs:

* have at least two big dogs and take them everywhere
* eat fish and game almost exclusively
* have at least two pair of Xtra-Tuff boots and hip waders
* wear the Xtra-Tuff boots to church, concerts, weddings, etc.
* wear shorts, tank tops, flip flops, shirt sleeves when temperatures are in the 40's
* buy their under ware at a hardware store
* have beards (men, that is)
* have everyday flannels and dress flannels
* bait their own fish hooks (we're talking women too, here)
* clean their own fish and game (even women)
* shoot their own game (women too)
* smoke-----fish and game, that is
* can fillet a 25lb halibut in 60 seconds
* can repair anything mechanical or electrical without a manual (men and women)
* go outdoors in rain, sleet, snow, ice, wind, blizzard, etc
* do not drink decaf coffee
* do not become vegetarians
* have 12 foot fences around their gardens to keep moose out
* know when fall is going to arrive by looking at the fireweed plants
* know the 764 fishing rules and exceptions
* live in a small space that they built themselves which may or may not have an indoor bathroom
* not afraid of hard work
* drive 4-wheel vehicles
* own or have access to a WWII 6x6 to drive through muskeg (far north peat bog)
* pick up hitch hikers
* have amazing stories to tell about homesteading
* are fiercely patriotic
* were baptized in a creek with 40 degree water
* have a generous, accepting, friendly spirit
* love the Lord and the land

So while I'm still gaping at moose in wonder, my sourdough friends are tracking them down to shoot and fill their larder for the winter.  I don't own Xtra-tuffs yet, but I do have hip waders!  I don't wear shorts in 40 degree weather, and I don't drink caffeinated coffee after noon.  My progress from cheechako to sourdough is slow.  I'm thinking it could take years and years!  Hmmm, should I make this a goal?
Believe me, it's tempting!




Pictures of "sourdough" housing: